`Tuesday, January 25, 2005;__
is not my day.. jus not..
FRIENDS = PRETENDER?
i jus realised how foolish i was to acctually treat u as a fren.
one of my closest fren. i'm jus so wrong. wad a fool i was.
yep FIRST time in my life tt i break down jus bcos of
the word friendship! is not my day. totally NOT.
i HOPE everything i saw on tt letter jus now was jus
a piece of SHITS.
but do u think is tt easy? NO is jus not tt easy to change
every single word in tt letter to be shits.
friendship is loyal, honest...
come on lah. ask yourself r u honest? r u loyal? if u are u
wudnt have said all those things behind my back. if u r, u shud
jus tell me stright tt u dun lk who i am. u dun have to
go tell so & so u dun lk me and wad shits . i got all this
from someone elses not U. u didnt dare to say. tt means
u r not honest!!! u r jus some one who is pretendin infront
\of me. and u said u hate pretenders. oh pls u yourself is
a pretender if u dont relize it! u act so innocent, u act as
if u r so caring, u act lk u r some angel from the heaven.
U R JUST ACTING! get it clear!
i shall type out wadever things on tt letter .
to let u noe how cruel a pretender is.
my letter to rowenna.
rowenna, i'm so disappointed, i jus feel lk i'm being
betrayed by someone who is so close to me. untill
today this morning i jus relised tt i'm such a stupid fool
to acctually believe tt someone who is close to me will
NEVER betrayed me. but i was so wrong. i NEVER noe
tt u r actually 2 sided.u r jus someone tt i turn to when
i nid some one and i cant imagine u did all that to me.
u might or might not be cryin rite now when u r readin
this letter but tts all i gonna tell u . i'll be 'careful' from
now on, i trust NOBODY. maybe yes 1 or 2.
i'm writing this not bcos i'm angry or wad i'm jus so
disappointed. dont explain or even aplogise i dunnid them all.
Juan`
veron:
eh, Juan, is jus a misunderstandin. i jus talk things
out with rowenna i confess i said she is 2 sided, is
acctually not,she said she just wanted to help u,
ur friendship with huiteng. 'i'm sorry rowenna'.
belief it or not i dun wan to see u and rowenna
lk tt, we r tryin to help u .
rowenna's reply.
i am also betrayed wad.. { i dun get wad she mean also}
i mean u shud atleast let me explain rite?
i jus dun wan u all to be lk so scattered.. not lk last time le.
i didnt noe anything, i jus want to noe why...
and i got the ans... it was MeiJin... she don't lk u
so she said lots of bad things abt u infront of HT.(HuiTeng)
i didnt want to be the middle man, i've no choice.
i beg u can u pls be lk last time... now huiteng with veron,
u and rebecca... i noe i dunt noe much abt u all...
but at least give me a try.
tell me wad more can i say? i'm totally
speachless. i'm disappointed. i'm
gettin so mad. i dun noe wad to say abt
the friendship, speachless abt it.
any one of u even care to bother abt my
personal problems and family problems
tt i'm facin every single every? any one of u
even care to ask? anyone? anyone of u
noe wads goin on in my life? anyone of u even
bother to ask y my laughters r so fake?
anyone of u bother to give a fuck abt it? NOBODY!
yet u ppl r givin me all these shits. i jus find it so
foolish tt i break down jus now. partly i was thinkin abt
the same questions on top over and over again
when i burst out jus now. i tot i was strong .
no i jus relised how fragile i am. all thx to those
problems and shits tt r pouring down on me by u ppl.
rowenna, i'm sorri tt i misundertook u. well
i wud rather not noe all tt u write in tt letter jus now.
honestly i hope i dun noe in the first place.
but is jus too late . since i noe everything now i'm sure
if u all r me u will react the same way.
veron, well everybody's at fault maybe...
i guess dunneed me to elaborate any further .
and i guess u shud understand VERY well after
readin this post.
Teng, i remenbered i did mention the phrase
'nobody in particular' so yep if u gonna think
tt way i've got nth to say also.
sulastri,rebecca, grace ,amanda, and those
malay boys lk hydar and? and those ppl
who came to cheer me up jus now and i kinda
ignore u guys. sorrie i wasnt bein dao or wad
so yep dun take it to heart. i'm sorry.
[[ wad is friendship? ]]
[[numb]]
`_______LISTEN TO MY HEART_______;__ 12:51 PM;__
